Who’s going to France

My 2 little girls are fascinated with holidays …getting away…”We’re going to the hotel”, my little one might exclaim out of the blue. She just loves the idea of the hotel and all that comes with it. When I was her age a hotel was a place for Kings and Queens. The thought of ever gracing the corridors of a hotel would not even enter my head unless my mother had a job at cleaning the bloody thing. Hotels even now scare me in a kind of silly kind of way. It’s as if I have this inbuilt idea in my head that I’m not good enough for a place like this. I’m not as bad as all that but there is a little flicker way back in the corridor’s of my brain that says, “Where do you think your’e off to with your high faluten’ ways…recession my arse!!!”

Is it like that with the Pitt’s when they stroll up to the reception of the best hotel in town all calm and collected. Are they trembling inside wondering whether or not they’ll be found out? Are they afraid they might get a tap on the shoulder just as they put the key in the door of their gigantic suite. Do they fall onto the four poster bed laughing with giddiness just as the concierge closes the dooor behind them…thinking “God, how lucky are we?…to be staying in his really cool hotel.”

Well, now it is my turn to step through the corridors of “semi” grandeur for once…a little treat thrown in to lift me from the drudge of every day life. God knows I need it…we all need it!

Speaking of my friends the Pitt’s …it’s one of my fantasies to be sitting in one of those restaurants on a cool sunny day somewhere in the arsehole of West Cork when who should come through the doors….”Well, if it isn’t my old buddy Brad and where is that lovely wife of yours…Ohh, Here she…Angelina..there’s a seat here by the window…..”

A few beers …a nice steak …watching the sun going down over Bantry bay…remember that time we made that movie with so and so….would you like to come back to the yacht for a few nite caps!!!! Well, who says it couldn’t happen …I’m a nice enough guy …I think we would rub along nicely! The only thing though unfortunately for me is that situation will never happen because I would probably be in the toilet with my youngest cleaning the ice cream from her face or worse!! and anyway there yanks…the have a different way about them. There was a situation in Kerry last year when we found ourselves ordering pub grub next to a big group of yanks a few tables away. They could have been famous for all I know but they just look funny…they dress different..they’ve got the swagger and the talk that us Irish just don’t have. It’s bred into them from the day they come into this world of ours.

God, my wife just threatened our youngest that if she doesn’t do such and such a thing we won’t be going to any hotel…it must be the umpteent threat of “We won’t be going to any hotel if you don’t….”

My kids are immune to it at this stage. They know we will go to the hotel…swim in the pool ….play with all the other lucky kids who were probably given the same threats by their mothers and fathers. I wonder does Brad have the same problem???


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